margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize