Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize