I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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