my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I have post one night stand depression
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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