I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
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I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
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I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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