Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though

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(917): sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though http://tfl.nu/3mr9

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(714): View more from California

I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.

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(714): I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy. http://tfl.nu/mwni

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(778): View more from British Columbia

i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?

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(778): i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea? http://tfl.nu/q7z7

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(252): View more from North Carolina

so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us

(205): View more from Alabama

that didnt stop you

(252): View more from North Carolina

nope

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(252): so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us (205): that didnt stop you (252): nope http://tfl.nu/4max

Replies (20) Good night (4751) Bad night (506)
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(541): View more from Oregon

we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory

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(541): we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory http://tfl.nu/4fuz

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(754): View more from Florida

You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.

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(754): You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm. http://tfl.nu/ypbk

Replies (18) Good night (4742) Bad night (962) Order T-Shirt
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(440): View more from Ohio

just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.

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(440): just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me. http://tfl.nu/8ykb

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.

(1-405): View more from Oklahoma

i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "

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(405): i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it. (1-405): i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. " http://tfl.nu/mvrv

Replies (40) Good night (9587) Bad night (945)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.

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(517): Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls. http://tfl.nu/kswf

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(503): View more from Oregon

I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..

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(503): I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions.. http://tfl.nu/v6no

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof

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(412): I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof http://tfl.nu/k401

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(303): View more from Colorado

I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.

(1-303): View more from Colorado

I like the way you think.

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(303): I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming. (1-303): I like the way you think. http://tfl.nu/s14n

Replies (6) Good night (1633) Bad night (484)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.

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(978): It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking. http://tfl.nu/nj2t

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(620): View more from Kansas

Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.

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(620): Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day. http://tfl.nu/8ts7

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(408): View more from California

We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.

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(408): We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell. http://tfl.nu/gwk2

Replies (6) Good night (1158) Bad night (265)

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