Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize