worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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