I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
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