I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize