I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize