does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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