I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize