well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize