Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
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I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
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I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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