He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize