I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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