I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize