Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize