Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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