idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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