there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize