You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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