have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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