I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
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stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
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Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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