I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize