are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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