I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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