Quick, to the slutcave!
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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