It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
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2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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