Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize