Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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