So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize