handjob tips. give me some.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
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