i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize