Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize