i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
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