I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize