it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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