girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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