what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize