Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize