You're my little dorito
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Randomize