I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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