those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize