If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize