i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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