they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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