Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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