dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize